Best of the Net 2009  

Driving Home Trying Not to Change the Station

I'm listening to NPR and they're interviewing
this guy, Steve Franklin, who's talking
at us about sustainable ecological systems,
about inner city fish farms, about not invading
the wild eco-systems, about how with a little extra
effort and some duckweed we can avoid the need
for mid-western soybeans and Peruvian
abalone. Steve tells us about some real efficient
aqua-environments powered by human
waste and then he brings up vegetarian dog food
and listening to Steve I'm thinking:
           Good People, Don't Be So Dull.

Don't be so unhip, you give Green Peace
a bad rap, the way you talk so slow,
the way you run for the chairmanship
of the committee, the way you're always humming
the theme song from the Sound of Music.
Good people, don't be so drab. I want to hear you
talk a little bad slang from 1958, give me a little daddio,
a little shubedoo, don't make me think of words
like dandruff and cauliflower -- check out
the Hassidim. At least they can dance.

Good people you give good works
a bad name in your LL Bean loose fit corduroy
jumpers, in your all-natural cotton sleepwear
and your double-soled hand-sewn moccasins from Maine.
I want to see you wear purple satin panties and go
to see a glass breaking, ass-shaking movie once a week.
My good people -- put away the pledge cards and
admit it -- Steve Franklin never gets a date.
Green waste. Brown waste. Grey waste don't make
no rainbow. Can't spin no color wheel.
Good people,
           you are driving me to rock and roll.

- Deborah Bogen (from Poemeleon)