Chocolate Waters

MY PERSONAL WANTS TO GET PERSONAL WITH YOU
(SWF ISO SWF or SWM or BJM or DJM or GWM or M&M’s)

I prefer Elvis,
but I am willing to consider someone else --
as long as you don’t look like George Dubya.
In the past five years
Christmas has come more than I have,
so I don’t care who I prefer.
I stopped abusing alcohol and
now only abuse small children and
people who can’t see.
I smoke
on elevators
and inform everyone that the NO SMOKING sign
is to remind the people who don’t anymore
that they’ve quit.
I once intended to become a rich and famous romantic
taxi cab driver.
Then I got over it and
decided I’d rather be a housewife
in New Jersey
with 116 pairs of Calvin Klein designer jeans,
a real estate license and a Hyundai.
I am everything I’ve always hated:
conservative, bourgeois, monogamous --
but I still intend to become rich and famous
and would like to meet someone here in New York City
who doesn’t.
If you adore sunrises -- with tequila in them --
wish you’d never heard of Teenage Mutant Beany Babies
and have a yellow-diamond shaped sign
hanging in your rear windshield
that says “Child In Trunk” --
then you must be the one for me.
Please RSVP.
Quickly!

An earlier version first published
in the Hollins Critic, 1992

	Location: New York, New York Email: http://www.chocolatewaters.com Website: c-w@chocolatewaters.com Publications: Bay Windows, Skidrow Penthouse, Cedar Hill Review, Samsara Quarterly, Doorknobs & Bodypaint, Conspire, Creative-Women.com, 2River, Perihelion, Thunder Sandwich, Stirring V2:E12, etc.
Awards:	New York Foundation for the Arts fellowship in poetry; Fellowship from the Barbara Deming Memorial Society